Playwriting One

AT RISE:

A SMALL KITTEN runs in an endless clockwise loop. Soothing classical music plays.

A MAN enters. He observes the kitten, who continues to run, oblivious. The man begins to run around the kitten in a counterclockwise circle.

A WOMAN appears. She waves at the man, who ignores her, and then at the kitten, who is in its own world. She frowns, then starts doing jumping jacks with her back to the audience.

A DIFFERENT WOMAN enters. The man stops running as the different woman rushes over to greet him. They clasp hands and skip in circles around the kitten, who is totally out of it by this point.

The first woman stops doing jumping jacks and gives a whistle. A 19TH CENTURY STRONGMAN enters, and picks up the kitten, carefully avoiding the man and woman, who are still running in circles. The kitten, it should be noted, is more than likely very dizzy at this point.

The first woman and the strongman toss the kitten gently back and forth between them, laughing merrily. A little too merrily.

The man and the second woman stop running and do fifty push-ups on either side of the kitten-tossing couple. Everyone is impressed.

Both women exit, leaving the strongman and the man-man standing side by side. They each hold half of the kitten.

A DISTINGUISHED GENTLEMAN and a MOOSE enter and flank the stage. The two women re-enter, the second woman now sitting on the first's shoulders. Everyone gives a classic "slow clap" and then:

KITTEN:
Politics!!!!

Jazz hands and bows all around.

A UNICYCLIST rides across the stage. Just as in real life, no one seems to care.

BLACKOUT. END PLAY.