Academic

AT RISE:

TWO PROFESSORS stand behind lecterns.

PROFESSOR 1:
Statement! The internet has promoted a new love of the written word amongst today's youth.

PROFESSOR 2:
Refutation! They waste the written word, bastardizing for convienience's sake, and using it only to promote their own shallow, mundane world views.

PROFESSOR 1:
Compromise! No-one appreciates anything properly anymore.

PROFESSOR 2:
Addendum! Except for me.

PROFESSOR 1:
Rider to the addendum! Except for us.

PROFESSOR 2:
Agreed!

They shake hands. Then there is some SEX and VIOLENCE to make sure the audience leaves satisfied.

BLACKOUT. END PLAY.