It's Cold Outside

AT RISE:

A MAN in long underwear.

LONG UNDERWEAR MAN:
Behold! Man's ost daring achievement! Long underwear! By donning this form-fitting and wooly garment, I do no less than stare into the face of God himself and declare his greatest creation unfinished! For how else should one feel when they take it upon themselves to improve upon the human machine, adding an extra layer of wool and warmth that our Creator deemed unescesssary? This simple truth is enough to shake even the most devout of men to their very core! So let us celebrate those who do what we perhaps cannot. Let us sing praise to those souls brave enough to incur divine wrath in the pursuit of but ten extra degrees of warmth! Let us salute those who have chosen what can only be called the continuatuion of the Prime Mover's work!

(beat)

So yeah, long underwear is awesome.

BLACKOUT, END PLAY.